June 16, 2003
To tell you the truth, I do pride myself as a good listener, better now than maybe a few years ago. I was fine then, of course! But, this one or two years, I've gotten even better as a listener. The difference? I was more talkative two years ago. So, it was like I had my fair share of babbling while others were sharing their tales.
It doesnt take a lot to listen, at least, that's the way it is to me. In fact, I'm always thankful I get to share a piece of a friend's life or even the taxi uncle's laments about life. Simply cos I know that for others to share their 'stories' with you is never an entitlement, but a privilege. They may be talking about people who you do not even know the existence of but if you have the patience to listen, there are indeed a lot of things and new points of view, differing opinions that you can reflect on and work those braincells on. That's why listening to people is never boring, not for me at least. *sounds like some Prudential Insurance advert...
Having said that, I must of course bring in a very, rather, some very important people in my life who Iistens to me. I would have wanted to say Wenn, my bestest of friends, first. cos the 4 hours long phone conversation i had with her on Friday night is still so fresh in mind. If we were a guy and a gal, we would probably be dating already. *yuckss, and wenn shares the same disgust. haha* But, I think to be more systematic, it should go something like this:
My
Mum first. I don't know how she finds the adventures of her daughter as a tutor of two little devils engaging. But, oh, Mums are the most wonderful people on Earth. Then,
Wenn. I don't know how she could stand listening to my senseless babbling, ostensibly logical but actually highly contradictory. But, I guess she must be somewhat intrigued by me. haha. Okay, she's not; it's just that if I've simple complications, she's complex simplicity. Then,
Guoqiang lah, The Royal Pain. Cos I had to make him listen to me, after all the shitty and potentially depressing tales that I've been getting from him. haha. But, no, we don't hate each other. In fact, we pride ourselves as being each other's Royal Pain (in the arse). Then, along came a knight, correction, my knight -
Eugene. He's like one of the sizta. Never met a guy who can listen as well as he does and at the same time, contribute as generously and kindly as he does. Then,
Hadrian. Always so kind, so patient and so encouraging. Tho I've recently been a lousy friend to him by procrastinating my many promises to meet up with him.
And this is really sounding like the Acknowledgements page of my thesis. haha. People don't use blogging service for this one lah!!! right? I'm supposed to tell you guyz who my latest crush is, which guy i'm dating now, who has been striked off the list and given the royal bitch treatment rite?
Okay. I'd try nex time.
the bottomeline for today? Always be thankful you were allowed to take part in people's conversations even as a mere listener. It's a privilege, not an entitlement. Cheers!
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 02:34
June 11, 2003
I've been writing. Well, has always been. Mind you, I do NOT mean the Honours Thesis. Now, that was quite an agonizing writing experience. But, thou shalt not be reminded.
I've been writing my random pieces of Chinese works. Well, something like my journal, I guess. Like Joe, he told me he writes in his journals(ss, cos so many!) and they are meant for his grandchildren to read. I'm not so far-sighted. Primarily because I have not decided if I would get married, though many has told me that it would be a great pity if I don't. Why? Cos I would make such a great wife and mother. Mind you, my xbf told me (when we were about to break up, anyway) that the thing about me is that I would probably be the best candidate if he were to look for a wife. Now, I STILL take that as a compliment, just that it was quite a bizarre thing to accept when you know you are going to go through a heart-wrenching breaking-up cry.
Anyway, so, like Joe, some people write because they want it as a part of the legacy for their grandkids. I don't know if I would ever have any. I write because I feel extremely happy and fulfilled upon writing a piece of work (no matter how short) with no blockage (aka writer's block). Speaking of which, that was the reason why writing the thesis was such an agony.
Those of you who think I'm just idling away my unemployed transition stage, please do take note that I am not as you perceive to be, bumming around at home, doing nothing constructive. I've been working, or rather, resuming my plan to have my own book. Well, unpublished one. But, yesh, I'd be showing it around when it's all done. To who? To people who probably will bother to read and people who have been my motivation to write.
Yeah... hehe. I'm so happy cos I juz printed out a couple pieces! N they look realli pretty! I'm so proud of myself! Never ceased to be. haha
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 02:21
June 09, 2003
hey, i juz watched Deep Impact, the movie, over channel 5. Tear jerker!!! watched it for 3rd time, never not cried.
First time was with Apple. It was after our exams, we went to the movies. Cried like noone's business then. That time, Armageddon was showing at around the same time as Deep Impact. Most of my friends ended up watching Armageddon and gave Deep Impact a miss. I did the opposite. In the end, i did watch Armageddon, but only on TV. Nope, din shed any tear. Was upset but not to that extent. But, Deep Impact, ahhh, that's a real tear jerker!
But, ooh, how nice to cry! I believe that people, everyone, needs to cry every once in awhile. "Tears are saltish,because they are supposed to heal" - that's what Lydia told me some 2 years ago when I was undergoing some really bad patch in my life. And yes, it does feel good crying sometimes. At the minimum, it lets me get in touch with my inner fears and insecurities, my inner emotional needs, often suppressed by sensibility and the need to stay composed.
I used to cry a lot, though. For reasons that seem all too unimportant now. Then, tears always were a result of hurt and pain and disappointments. Crying was tiring. Today, tears feel like a refreshing wash that I actually yearn for from time to time. Weird? Not at all! I've never despise people, men included, who cry. Truth be told, unless you are the whining sort, it actually does take some courage to cry.
Now, back to the movie, maybe I should get the VCD....
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 22:26
June 04, 2003
Anyday, when I want a good cup of tea (cos i dun realli take coffee a lot), and have rather limited brain power to think about where to go for it, I head down to Coffee Club, Millenia Walk. Their Iced Passion Tea is quite safely, my all-time fave! As ironic as me, the name, i meant. hehe... Wenn prefers their Iced Earl Grey Tea. Earl Grey, very fragrant and very refreshing. I love the scent of bergamot, by the way. It's uplifting, apt for anytime of the day, any where in this potentially depressing world we live in. But, I still prize my Iced Passion over Iced Earl. And we, wenn and myself, both discovered Muddy Mud Pie! Cappucino and Choco ice-cream on a thick bed of cookie crust, topped with hot fudge. Mmmm, even for a non-choco lover like me, it's yummy!
Coffee Club is realli really quite different from Coffee Club Express oki! For those of you who can't seem to get it straight between these two and CBTL, please make an effort to clarify and decide your preference. To me, CC Express sells horrid drinks! True, it's still under CC, but the drinks are really, in the judgement of my tastebuds, quite horrid. but, oh! CBTL teas are equally horrid! hehe
The one time I remember most fondly about my afternoons at CC, Millenia Walk was once that I brought along a book to read. There, under the dim lighting wif cosy seats, i finished one whole book. N a waitress then offered to adjust the lighting to make it more conducive for me to read. Wonderful service.
But my fave CC outlet isn't the one at Millenia Walk. It was the one that used to be sitauted right in the mid of the shophouses along Singapore River, Boat Quay. That was my fave, still is. just that it's no longer there.
If, one day, you too are feelin bored and have nothing to do, ring me. We could go for a good cup of tea with a good book in hand. Or we could just look at how time flew past, how the things that we used to think matter so much did not matter no more. Ya, we could do that. Iced Passion for me, please. *smile*
Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 03:14